'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I am one with the molecules
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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