there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize