sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
