Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize