drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
this beer tastes like vomit already
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
