Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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