Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
My dad is sitting where you rode me
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
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