its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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