I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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