i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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