You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
