Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
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