Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
no you cant smoke seaweed
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I would ride that face into the sunset
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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