i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
