If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
