do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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