Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
