He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize