hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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