The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
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