Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
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