cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
