Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
