She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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