I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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