If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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