D3 body, D1 cock
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
