I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
