Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
