Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize