we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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