So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
