How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
