There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
honey bunches of taint.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize