I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
