Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
