so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
