I think my vagina is haunted
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
how does that bad decision feel?
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