using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
