I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
