It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
