So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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