Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize