She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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