fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
