That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
