peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Randomize
