in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
