she looked like the before picture.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
