chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
