he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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