walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
His nipple licking is glorious
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