You smell like a Billy Joel song
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
This toilet bowl is my home.
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